By Anthony Hecker
FAM MEMBER
AFTER our son’s entry into the SELF program in October 2009, we have met with him twice. The first was for a Family Encounter on May 17, and the second for our 1st Family Dialogue on June 23.
When Tony walked into the room for our Family Encounter, I was surprised and pleased. He had a self-confidence and poise that I had never seen before. As he talked with us, he did not have the twitchiness and the ers and ahs that we were accustomed to.
He began by speaking about his feelings and what he had expected in a family, and went on to admit that we had not met many of his expectations. My wife Luz spoke about the family atmosphere that, ironically, she felt she was proud to have established. I began by saying to Tony that we seemed to have three different sets of expectations of what a family would be like: mine, his, and his mother’s.
I admitted that there had been times when I was not as present to him and Luz as he would have wanted. I had many demands upon my time and energy because of my work at St. Louis University. Looking back, I wondered whether Tony would have turned out better with a different set of parents. (more…)
